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vlog ~ Finding Compassion, Again

May 11th, 2012 by

The path of finding compassion, again.

“At times I almost dream.
I too have spent a life the sage’s way.
And tread once more familiar paths.
Perchance I’ve perished in an arrogant self-reliance
an age ago, and in that act of prayer
for one more chance went up so earnest, so…
Instinct with better light let in by death
that life was blotted out not so completely,
but scattered wrecks, enough of it to remain
dim memories. As now, one seems
once more…
the goal in sight again.”
~Paracelsus, Robert Browning

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Being Divine

May 11th, 2012 by

Hi Kelley. I’ve always believed that the individual soul is eternal, but lately I’ve read that eventually the soul merges with God and loses its individuality when it is “finished” learning all that it can. Is this how it goes? Do we really all lose our soul and all whom we’ve loved? This thought brings me such sadness, I would really appreciate your insight. Thank you, Briana

The Creation of Adam by Michelangelo

The Creation of Adam by Michelangelo

Thanks for your note, Briana. I’m not certain how it goes, and I dare say anyone else is. All I can express around the experiences of a soul are that of my own, through my shamanic journeys.

This sounds like more of a riddle than I intend, but the only way we can re-integrate with Source is if we believe we were ever separate from it to begin with. I have not found it to be true that we are separate from Source, or from anything else in All Things. This unity is the core basis of animism.

An indigenous creation story I read years ago explains it better than I could (I tore the house looking for it, to no avail, so if I find it will include the source ;) . After a very long time of being, the Source of All Things (God) felt that it had reached a limit in the range of experiences it could have just being its singular self. To broaden its viewpoint and expand its consciousness, it decided to experience itself different ways, so that it could learn more about All Things, thus itself. So it split itself up and came into form as trees, water, dogs, people…

I’ve never read a creation story that resonated more with me than that one. The confidence I take from it is something we have been told is a dangerous belief, and that is: we are all Divine. All of us, every one. Every person you meet is connected to you, every flower, every raindrop. We are all looking back at ourselves and simultaneously creating our unique lives, feeling isolated.

The sense of isolation, itself, my guides tell me, is The Fall. The belief that we are all Source is what we come here to be reminded, yet our very birth and formation into earthly consciousness strips that truth away. We spend life figuring out how to remember. And because you think to ask the question, Briana, because an opposing belief challenged your isolation, you are remembering.

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Online Class: Writer’s Block and the Shamanic Narrative

Apr 26th, 2012 by

Have a writing project that just isn’t moving? Want to approach it from a completely fresh, inspiring perspective? Join me for the online class I’m teaching, Writer’s Block and the Shamanic Narrative, at the Pagan Writer’s Community. If you have an open mind and an overly active imagination, this class can help you get moving again. Details:

writingWriter’s Block and the Shamanic Narrative
Purpose:   To examine writer’s block from an animistic, spiritual perspective, and through the use of art and the shamanic narrative in the Middle World journey, learn how to reconnect with the spirit of writing, and the potential of the blank page.

Cost: $60

Duration: Four Weeks

Starting Date: May 7, 2012

Prerequisites:  Experience with meditation. Experience with shamanic journeying is a plus, though not required. A work in progress. Ability to scan documents.

Requirements:  Open mind. A stalled project or muse. Willingness to draw. Lucid in imaginative meandering.

Feel free to buzz me with questions at kelley at soulintentarts dot com.

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vlog – Anxious Peace

Apr 18th, 2012 by

Forgive the allergy voice…

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Wise Voice, Author Valerie Nieman – What Waits Just Around the Bend

Apr 17th, 2012 by

It was a gentle turn in the white-sand road, a curve that disappeared into the Florida scrub. The afternoon sun slanted through the trees and January mosquitoes gathered around my face whenever I stopped too long. Nothing mysterious about this place or time, yet the bend in the road kept me walking.

I was alone on the trail with my dachshund, paced by the crunch of his feet and mine on the sand, the drone of an airplane, and the intermittent calls of birds. I was taking a stretch after a long drive. I had no reason to keep going deeper into the woods, yet each bend in the path beckoned me onward.

After the flamboyance of the Keys, this place seemed dull. I found the broken-apart scutes of a turtle and put one in my pocket as a souvenir. Maybe that was all, the only reward for this walk – and then a flash of white flared in the woods to the left, a big bird winging down the canal. It was a great white heron, the southerly form of the familiar great blue heron. I kept walking, the heron flying ahead, landing, and then when I again got too close, lifting with a prehistoric squawk!

Just as I paused, thinking about turning back, I saw the spoonbill. The rosy exemplar of all that was Florida. The image that I bought at Audubon House in Key West. There it was, strolling up and down on a lawn across the narrow canal, pecking at the ground like a Seussian version of a chicken. That was why I’d kept walking, the promise of something magical, something unexpected, just around the next bend.

So what does all this have to do with writing?

We need to provide the reader just such gentle curves in our stories, the bends that conceal what’s really quite close, the moment of held breath as the promised scene unfolds.

Don Fry, a wonderful coach whom I remember from my days as a newspaper reporter, called these “gold coins” – “something readers will enjoy, such as a terrific quote, a striking new character, a wonderful sentence, a telling detail, or an amusing anecdote.”

As Fry explains it, readers will begin to lose interest as they keep moving into a longer article. They may even think about stopping. “They need a lift to their spirits and expectations. So we put something wonderful just before the sag, a little bit that will refresh them, a reward for reading that far,” Fry says.

Now, the thing about human nature is that we don’t need a steady shower of gold coins. Whether it’s an article, a short story, a novel, we use our writerly craft to move the narrative forward, but it still requires mental work to follow a narrative. The reader has to put one foot in front of the other. So reward that reader with occasional joyful surprises – reinforcement, if you recall your psychology.

In operant conditioning, reinforcement is anything that strengthens or increases a behavior (as in reading all the way to the end). While continual reinforcement will work, there is something about the human mind that responds just as strongly to partial reinforcement, when gold coins or cookies are provided only some of the time.

We keep walking, waiting for that wonderful bird.

We keep reading, expecting the lovely phrase or startling moment or scintillating bit of dialog.

When I was just beginning to see the shape of the novel that would become Blood Clay, I had a moment of shuddering déjà vu. I was driving down a highway in North Carolina, newly my home. I looked to the left and saw a dirt road curve into the woods. On the outside of the turn, a sickle of standing water reflected the sky. I stopped, right there on the highway, trying to remember where I had seen it before. And it came back, a dirt road through the woods that my father used to take as a shortcut, a place he told me was “Bambi’s woods.” And I remember holding my breath as he turned there, and watching deep into the woods as we splashed through puddles left by recent rain.

I’m now at work on another novel – discovering new things every day about the characters, the back story, unexpected linkages. It’s what keeps me moving forward, as a writer. And those same rewarding moments will, I hope, someday lure the reader as well – turning the pages with the expectation of the reward that waits just around the bend.

~*~*~*~

Valerie Nieman is the author of Blood Clay, a novel about newcomers in the New South, as well as collections of short stories and poetry. She teaches writing at North Carolina A&T State University and is the poetry editor of Prime Number magazine.

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Summer Release for Gift of the Dreamtime!

Apr 16th, 2012 by

I have exciting news–the second edition of Gift of the Dreamtime – Awakening to the Divinity of Trauma is slated to come out this Summer! So many people have contributed kind energy to it and spoken highly of it while getting the manuscript ready, it’s been wonderful!

“Give Gift of the Dreamtime to every wounded person you know. You’ll be healing them, healing yourself, and helping to heal the earth, herself.” -Barbara Ardinger, author of Secret Lives and Pagan Every Day.

“Absolutely recommend Gift of the Dreamtime to anyone, especially those working to overcome their own traumas.” — FacingNorth

“Her gift of sharing offers readers insight into how we can learn to understand those things that are beyond our control while gaining control of our own destiny.” — SageWoman

To give proper respect to the first edition and to those who helped it become, if you have read Gift of the Dreamtime, please “Like” it, tag it (tags on product pages push it higher in search engine results), and to write a review of it.

Closer to its release, join me in celebrating with many soul and energy healing specialists sharing information on trauma recovery and spiritual revival. Thanks for your support in this lovely transition into new life!

Of Gift of the Dreamtime:

In this fantastical memoir, Kelley Harrell chronicles a modern shamanic journey from pain to healing, and accepting a calling to work as a soul healer of others.

Groundbreaking at the time of its first publication in 2004, no other modern shamanic work shared an experience of soul healing told from within the shamanic narrative, bringing relatable and credible insight to contemporary soul healing.

Through that rare glimpse into her experiences traversing the spirit world, Harrell’s story becomes the reader’s adventure.

Not always easy to read, there are unflinching passages examining hurtful childhood memories, confrontations with overzealous spirit guides, and challenging personal obstacles she must overcome in order to heal.

The book combines Harrell’s personal journey with instructions for creating similar soul journeys to help the injured child in all of us look at the hurt, understand it in a spiritual context, and forgive both ourselves and others.

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Healing the PTSD of Hurtful Etheric Caregiving

Apr 11th, 2012 by

Kelley, I found you through Soul Cafe. Yesterday I had a horrendous experience with a sound healer. I felt he did not listen to me, passed judgement on me, left me feeling hurt, angry, abused, terribly alone, and misunderstood. He talked a lot and no sound healing took place. In trying to make sense of this and reviewing the session I feel he was very harshly teaching me a lesson about there being no one able to save me but myself, that I have all the power to do so. What is it about me that creates situations where I always feel isolated, different, not heard properly? I seem unable to communicate clearly. In that session I quite literally lost my voice. I keep getting stuck in cycles where I begin to blossom and then wither, and experience loss. More than the loss of the person there is the pain of looking at the situation and having to contemplate how wrong I was about everything, all the positive signs. How can I return on my path? How can I pick myself up again? Best wishes, Sam

Thanks for your note, Sam. I’m sorry that you experienced such judgement from a supposed healer. I wholly trust your assessment of the situation, and I’m glad that you do, too. Although this previous Q&A isn’t the same as what you experienced, the underlying necessity of etheric work having meaning for the client persists.   Not only could he not address your concerns, he couldn’t meet you where you are.  I’m sure the harsh things he said to you did urge you into a different, more aware energetic space. The thing is, he could have ushered you into that space without judgement, fear, and now PTSD, and that’s the part that really chaps me. Not only did he not meet his obligation to you in the healing, but the whole session didn’t have to be that way.

When I ask your guides to reveal the resonant thread in this experience, they flick that guy in the ear. As well, they deeply urge you to find and connect with a spiritual community of peers, benevolent beings not necessarily on the same path you are, but those who can compassionately witness your growth and allow you to witness theirs. At some point we all need like-minded others who can help us hold the space–our own space and that which we hold in All That Is.  We’re not meant to hold it alone all the time.  This guy reinforced to you that not only are you supposed to hold it alone all the time, but that there is something wrong with you if you don’t.  You came to him asking for help doing just that, and he let you down then kicked you for being down.

Finding like-hearted folk will help you heal from this ‘healing’ experience. I respect that you are a spiritual person and you look to the soulful education in all experiences. This drive to find the light in all things carries you. The hurt that this man inflicted is real and needs to be released. As you describe, he was only the most recent experience in a long chain of loss. Because the hurt he inflicted is so fresh, healing this hurt can provide a release for the entire pattern. The guy didn’t have a message for you, bless him. He was the message:  It’s time to release feeling stuck in a pattern of hurt and loss.

In the New Age is the sentiment that we all heal ourselves. While I do believe that, the statement is incomplete. We can’t heal what we aren’t aware of, and we can’t heal with skills we don’t have.  Sadly, numerous energy workers  cling to the idea that we should all just know what we need.  To me the inability of a healer to fill that informational gap shows at minimum a lack of education in the ability to teach the needed skills, and at most a lack of compassion in helping at a more human level. With some healers there is so much emphasis on the spiritual, that more mundane needs go unmet. Wounds happen on all levels, and so does healing.

I do encourage you to connect with others, and through references find a healer who can compassionately assist you on your path.  If at all possible, find someone with the skills to help you process what comes up in the work you are doing.  If a healer can’t help you with skills to cope with the emotional depths, ask them for a reference to a professional who can.  Depending on where you are, I would love to work with you–in-person or remotely.  Also, there are a couple of things that would be helpful for you to do for yourself:

  • Alone in a quiet, meditative space, imagine going back to that session. See it in full detail–the moment you walked in the door, the sounds, the scents, the way it felt, when you met him. Be the experience again, only this time you have your voice. As the experience unfolds, say the things you needed to say to that guy and couldn’t. Let him know how you feel about the way he is treating you and about his role as an energy worker. Thank him for the growth you’ve had as a result of meeting him, and see yourself walk out the door. When you feel grounded in your body, open your eyes and take a few deep breaths.
  • Another thing is, your guides are very close to you and are very in tune with what you really need. They are available to inform you on direction in your spiritual growth. Imagine meeting them in a similar fashion as above. Alone in a quiet, meditative space, see yourself in the most comfortable, serene Nature space that you can conceive. Notice how it feels, how it smells, the atmosphere. As you sit and enjoy the space, hold in thought that you allow your guides to come. They may be humanoid higher beings, animal or plant totems. Just sit with what comes and observe. If and when it feels appropriate, ask them questions. They can be a bit tricky about interviews, so tread lightly and keep it mostly to observation. Do this everyday for a week or two. The closer you come to your spirit guides, the more you will attract a solid spiritual community in form.

Cheers for you, Sam. You’re onto something great!

 

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Guest Blog – Making Community

Mar 28th, 2012 by

I had the wonderful opportunity to guest blog this week at Dragon’s Den:

I joke to my flist on Live Journal about dreams that I have, in which we gather for reunions infused with long-weekend slumber parties and lots of gluten-free snack foods. The thing is, I really have had that dream recurrently, for years, and half or more of the people on my flist I’ve never met in-person. These are people I’ve met through various venues, interests, and life stages, who for whatever reason have become a solid presence in my life for the last nine years. Yet in some odd ethereal way those dreams are gatherings of this unique clan of writers, soul friends, spirited minds, and our time together is very much not our first meeting. It is a reunion. We are not starting from a beginning. We are in progress.

Other online groups I meet in dreams for rituals, the creative goddesses who craft the cosmos through their art, the global priestesses who genuinely do tend All Things in their daily spiritual practices. We assemble and bless the event, evoke the spirit, chart it into our footsteps then clear out, leaving not a careless crumb behind, cos we are ladies, after all. These are my dream communities, not just in my dreams but my ideals… more

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New Motherhood and a Near Life Experience

Mar 21st, 2012 by

Hello Kelley-
Immediately following the birth of my son I had an eclamptic seizure. I had another two hours later, at which point I was medically sedated and put in intensive care for my son’s first night of life. I feel there is a spiritual lesson to be gained from this experience, but I’m having a hard time accessing it. Since then, almost two years ago, I’ve had a difficult time feeling as in-tune spiritually. It’s hard to tell if that’s just new motherhood or tied to the seizures. Any insight would be so helpful! Thank you, E

Thanks for your note, E. I commend you for examining your experience at a deeper level, when new motherhood is already a challenging life change. Seizures and coma are acute experiences of soul separation, or “soul shelving” as I often refer to it. It is natural for aspects of the soul to wander in and out. Through this unconscious travel our consciousness expands. However, sometimes soul aspects that need to return can’t. That’s when chronic imbalance sets in, and is where physical, emotional, and spiritual dis-ease manifests.

When I ask to see the moment of your first seizure from a spiritual perspective I am shown that your body took that moment to show you part of your personal story that you needed to see, but couldn’t see from an earthly vantage point. In that moment I see you in a space between lives, in a very bright golden light, meeting with a maternal feminine presence. I don’t have a feel for who she is or was in your current manifestation, though she is or was in form with you in this manifestation at some point (and others prior). She shares with you how happy she is for you, that she’s been caretaking the soul of your son until he could go to you, and that she would see you again. This was a peaceful exchange that did not get to complete as you needed it to. Perhaps your doctor intervened, or your state of being just didn’t allow you to hold it. There was something more that you needed from that presence and it did not come–something said, a gift given or received, gratitude expressed. An exchange of energy with this presence did not get to happen that you needed to. Being yanked back into your body left you emotionally raw and somewhat etherically super-charged. Despite the joy at sharing with this woman in this space, not getting closure in the exchange on top of the delight of having a new son overwhelmed you. I call these near life experiences. They are akin to being rudely awakened from a great dream, just short of cathartic enlightenment.

When I ask to see the source of the second seizure intense feelings of missing this feminine presence smother me. My feeling is that part of your soul was trying to get back to that place where you met her in the initial seizure. When you found that you couldn’t, a deep emotional shock rippled through your field and stayed with you. In essence, by being so emotionally moved at the first visit, the sadness at not being able to achieve it again took precedence over the joy of the first visit.

I ask to see your life force now and how this experience has manifest for you. You have recovered very well, and have managed to create your life force in a stronger way than it was before motherhood (go you!). I do still see that there is a thread of sadness in clinging to this feminine presence. It’s not a major impediment to you. You are extremely intuitive, devoutly aware and active in the unseen. Yet, there is a perpetual feeling that something is missing, unfinished. Whatever this unfinished business is, it influences your ability to feel like you can healthily and thoroughly pass on your etheric lineage and wisdom to those who come after you. I suspect it also draws on how ancestral wisdom was passed (or not) to you.

However this chapter of your soul’s narrative strikes you, what do you need to say? Even if nothing comes to you that you would say to this feminine presence, in life right now, what do you need to say that you don’t? What is the deepest thing in your heart that you hold back? This is the thing that you need to go back to that space and speak.

In a meditative space, imagine meeting this presence and speak these things. However it forms, let it–even if it’s not like I described. If you don’t feel comfortable approaching it that way, autowrite. Allow that feminine presence to have your nondominant hand for a session, then begin writing. Whatever comes, just write, scribble, even if it doesn’t make sense. Attempt it several times over a few days, making sure to close each session by thanking the presence and flinging your hands, flexing them a bit to get your neurology back to normal. If there is another way that you feel comfortable experiencing a return to this space–ecstatic journey, drawing it in art, journaling–let it come. How you do it is up to you. The need is that you find the way to reconnect with this feminine presence and let her know what you needed to then, as much as now.

Beyond this closure, if feelings related to ancestral lineage not having properly passed to you persist, this is something to look into with a healer. If I can help in any way I would be glad to, E. Dream well.

Submit inquiries to Kelley at Intentional Insights.
Contact Kelley for services at Soul Intent Arts.

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Heal the Past, Free the Body – The Impact of Emotional Healing

Feb 22nd, 2012 by

Kelley, I am writing because of a problem that has consumed so much of my energy and confidence. I have been experiencing gradual hair loss for about five years. I have tried medical treatments with no success. I have also had blood tests done which did not reveal anything. I am at a loss and have tried all sorts of things but to no avail. I have found this so deeply humiliating. I am at a loss and quite desperate. Is there something going on I am not aware of? P.

Hi P. Thanks for your note. When I feel your etheric field, there’s a lot of anxiety in it. This anxiety feels very old, as if it has amassed over many years. Specifically, what I feel in it is fear of being judged and ridiculed, and these fears stem from childhood into the present.

I don’t feel that as an adult you carry conscious awareness of these fears. That is, you don’t carry thoughts around related to being judged or ridiculed. Yet, at some point in your youth you carried them for years, and these thoughts have become internalized at a deeper, subtler level. I’m not certain why hair loss is the specific result of these fears, but I do feel that it is a result of them.

When emotional states are left unresolved, they become beliefs. These beliefs become the foundation by which we set our boundaries and perspective of life. Eventually hurtful emotional states and beliefs take a toll on the body.

Address this anxiety, specifically the beliefs, “I am only as valuable as others find value in me,” and “My sense of self is defined by others,” and you will quell the hair loss. I suggest doing some research on a good Traditional Chinese Medicine doctor who works with 5-element or 8-element acupuncture to help get your meridians back in balance. I do think that the body is drained and needs support. This is a good way to revive it. Emotionally I would look into techniques that allow you to release feelings and emotions that no longer serve you. This could be Reiki, Emotional Freedom Technique, or a more traditional therapeutic approach. Spiritually you need nurturing. Seek this in a local shaman, or if you are open to distance work, we could work together.  The more you focus on emotional healing, the less physical symptoms there will be.

I do see this condition as one you can manage, P, and I wish you the best health and happiness!

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